Thursday, 26 July 2018

SUPPORTING UPSET/GRIEVING FRIENDS


SUPPORTING UPSET/GRIEVING FRIENDS

Your intentions are good!
You genuinely feel the sorrow of the other person.
And off you go to make a call or a visit

THEN YOU DO IT TOTALLY WRONG!
Awww, but I had good intents
Yes you do but,

When a friend, colleague, family or a loved one is:
Grieving the loss of someone or something dear,oss of a job, or
Going through a rejection e.t.c

All they need is SUPPORT.

When commiserating or grieving with someone,
Don’t:
Ever say you know how they feel-IF YOU REALLY DON’T
Contradict how they feel (Make them know they have the right to feel the way they do)
Ever make it about you (don’t say ‘just like when I ------)
Don’t add any advice- it is wrong to say ‘If you had tried this, then this will never happen’

ALWAYS UNDERSTAND:
That the grieving person is not you, so:
  • Learn to just sit there and allow them be
  • Squeeze their hand, rub their backs,
  • Give a huge teddy bear hug, 
  • Learn to listen without interrupting.
  • Offer your support and time
  • Run errands for them,
  • Give them privacy if they asked for it.
  • Be genuine in your communication and don’t hide your feelings.
  • Unless they ask for your opinion, don’t give it


I Love You!

My Thursday Musings
Olukemi Gbenga-Dada
©2018


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